So, it’s nearly here. The day I have been dreading. Tomorrow morning I will awaken, no longer in my twenties. I will be 30 years old.
It’s a terrifying age to be. All prior landmark birthdays are cause to celebrate because we spend so many years wishing to be older and now I reach the first where I wish I was young. At least when you hit 40 you should be well prepared for Death’s cold hand reaching for your shoulder for that really is the end of all things (see blog ten years from now for info).
Anyway, I have spent my day looking for reasons turning 30 is a good thing and I can find very little apart from unencouraging shite such as ‘you are an adult’ and ‘you can start living now’. Thanks, here’s me thinking I was a dead child. Continue reading “It’s My Party And I’ll Throw Faeces If I Want To”
As a follow up to my previous article on Spider-man in Belfast I have decided, due to popular demand, to post Captain Planet’s adventures in Belfast also. Aren’t we a popular city, eh? Awesome accents as usual. Continue reading Captain Planet In Belfast
I have never really been a comic person. As I kid I read Buster and the Beano. When a little older I tried X-Men and if I’m honest found it hard going. I got into Marvel in the late 80s through the now legendary cartoons. It started with Spider-man and his Amazing Friends. You know the one where Spider-man, Firestar and Ice-man lived together in an apartment that turned into some sort of command centre. I loved that, when all the furniture changed into all those 80s style computers when the big fire monster attacked the city. Also, Firestar was Hot (pardon the pun). Continue reading “Spider-man Takes on the IRA”
On Saturday 23rd 2011 at Eagle’s Rock, Draperstown the ‘small but MASSIVE’ Glasgowbury festival begins. Nestled in the Sperrin mountains, the annual gathering sets the sky on fire with music from the hardest working of Irish talent and now we have our 2011 headliner and I couldn’t be more excited to hear it’s… Continue reading “Glasgowbury 2011: First Acts Announced”
I hate wearing glasses, it sucks. It’s not just the fact you have two walk around with two lb of glass and metal attached to your face but once in a while you have to make your way to an opticians and get your eyes tested. It’s a shitty experience only made worse by the sizeable bill at the end. Even the buy one get one free deal doesn’t make it any more palatable.
The other day I made a trip to specsavers after putting it off for about 2 years. I could spend a few hundred words telling you what happened but my Facebook status updates tell it so well. The growing strop started in Specsavers and went on right up until I got home, here’s what happened: Continue reading “Optical Illusion”
I love ’80s movies, they’re just awesome. Ghostbusters, Aliens, Ferris Bueller’s Day off, Weekend at Bernie’s, Back to the Future, Goonies and many many more.
However there is one strange feature of 80s movies that has often left me rather confused and perplexed. The necessary hottie in so many of these films is inevitably a munter. Even the female popstars of the day look like rejects from Labyrinth. Here are a few examples: Continue reading “The Ugly 80s”
We all know there are plenty of gay films out there (Brokeback Mountain, My Own Private Idaho, Rocky V) but it seems there are some that are still in the closet. I was watching Wall Street last night and I was quite disturbed to see a few homoerotic scenes between Bud Fox and Gordon Gecko and this got me wondering how many films have such unintentional(?) gay undertones.
After a (rather disturbing) bit of research here are the top five unintentionally homoerotic scenes in film in order of gayness: Continue reading “Hidden Homoereoticism: Top 5 Unintentionally Gay Movie Scenes”
On January 2rd 2011 our favourite plum mouthed action hero left his office as Governor of California after nearly eight years of bum slapping and slagging Boris Johnson. Many of us film buffs have wondered what was next for Arnie. Another Terminator film, a Twins sequel with amorphous monkey face Danny deVito or some hopeless comedy clone of the like of Junior?
Well true to his word he is back and it’s none of the above…..for Arnold Schwarzenneger is….. Continue reading “The Governator”
This years South by Southwest festival brought about a cultural revelation. It featured the debut of a Joe Nicolosi directed and produced short that takes Super Mario to a whole new level.
Recreating this well known story as an Indie flick was an inspiration and has led to this hilarious short film. Nicolosi has done for Mario what Christopher Nolan did for Batman. Continue reading “Super Mario Begins”
The new issue of my favourite magazine dropped through the door yesterday. I have been a faithful subscriber to Empire for years and look forward to it’s arrival. Not having time to read it right away I threw it in my bag and off to work I went. At some point during my shift I decided to drop the kids off at the pool so I lifted the magazine and off I went to see porcelain Pete. Thank God I was sitting there when I opened the magazine because I would definitely have shit myself for there it was, at … Continue reading Empire of the Son